Tag Archives: Friday Ramblings

Friday Ramblings

Hi Everyone!

It’s been a week already. For me, the week flew by. I have been wanting to write some things but got a tad overwhelmed in thought and have yet to get it to print. Plus, I have been delving into my RC car racing this week. I have to admit, I learned a ton of mechanical theory on suspensions. I hope this helps me this spring when I get back into racing. I have learned that I had my car way out of adjustment. No wonder that car was hard to drive.

My convert story was posted on Islamwich. Theresa and Kaighla asked me if I’d like to write a convert story from a male point of view. I told them I would be glad to. I worked hard on this story. I kind of put myself out there more than I normally would. This is the first time I delved into my Christian life and some of the bad turns I made. It was liberating really. Hey, I also feel this is my best piece of writing yet. I have never said that I was a writer but I feel I’m getting better.

There was a couple of articles that had me thinking a lot this week. I spent a lot in thought about them. I think I will share them in my next post. I just need to get those thoughts out. It is important.

Anyway, this is going to be short.

Have a great weekend and a great week coming up.

Hey, may God love you all up!

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Friday Ramblings

Hi Everyone!

I can’t believe my last post here was three years ago. It is amazing how time gets away from me. Yes, I am still here. Fighting mental illness has been a real struggle these last three years and with that fight, I didn’t feel like writing. I apologize for letting this blog go. I just didn’t feel I could write decent material because I was so down. Who knows though, I might have written some of my best work if I’d tried. That might be true. However, I just thought it was best to just be quiet.

How are things going for me? I have gone through a lot. I have been hospitalized five times, tons of therapy, and just a few months ago, ECT (Electroconvulsive therapy). I also found my religion. Yep, I am no longer a free agent. I have always been in flux over a spiritual home. It was a lot of soul searching. Even though I was in the battle of my life with depression, my faith in God was strong. God gave me the strength needed to find him.

What did I choose? I chose to enter Islam.

It was a choice I did not make lightly. It was a lot of work. Islam is not exactly portrayed in a positive light. However, when one pills away the crap slinging, there is a beautiful religion underneath. I am still found of Judaism too. The nice thing about Islam is the fact that you can enter anytime and then grow from there. Judaism requires one to grow first before joining. My troubles have been growing up. God through Islam allows me to grow at my own pace. Oh, I am sure that there are a few that disagree with me but I have convert friends who say otherwise. I am told to not worry about moving slowly.

I sure was going to be a Jew, don’t get me wrong. I fought hard. Yet, family considerations with a ton of xenophobia just became too much. Plus, I was starting to become really ill. Yes, I gave up. How am I getting past the xenophobia now, I am remaining silent. Not what I prefer, however, the harmony of my family is my number one concern. I have two wonderful children to think about.

The big reason for entering Islam is I was lonely. I had this strong faith in God, yet no one to share and relate with. I so needed a spiritual home. I had three choices, Christianity, Judaism, or Islam. Christianity required me to rehash my past and I would rather not, it was out. Judaism required me to go all in before even getting a chance to be a part of the tribe. Realistically, that was not going to happen. I just don’t think I can get my life together quick enough and my loneliness has been overwhelming. Islam just came together. I was asked to enter Islam and I accepted the offer. Like I said, it just seemed to come together naturally. It was strange, heartwarming, and beautiful. I am still amazed at how God works.

Yes, I am Muslim. Has that changed me? Ahh…Nope. This is the same James who all my readers have gotten to know. Some of my readers of the past are still in touch with me through Facebook. Some others I have lost touch with. I sure miss you all. You and this blog are a major step in my life. I wouldn’t be who I am today without you all.

Is this blog coming back to life? I don’t know for sure. I would like to say yes. Yet, I am not sure I have it in my. When I write something serious, I do a lot of reading about it. I look at it every way possible and pretty much have smoke coming out my ears. Writing is exhausting. Yet, I love it.

Stay tuned though, write me if you would like. Tell me you want me to get off my butt and write. Hehe

Take care Y’all. May God love you up.

Friday Ramblings

Hello Everyone,

I thought maybe instead of running from my troubles, I think I will turn around and open Religiously Challenged backup. I received a Hanukkah card from a dear friend, who obviously did not know my current religious state, which is still deemed “Complicated”. Nonetheless, I found myself deeply touched by the card and it made me realize that I need to stop running from the pain that I am still harboring. Yes, I would still love to be apart of the Tribe, unfortunately my life that I have made for myself over my 40+ years of existence will not seem to let me. Anyway, that is the crappy side of my life at the moment. However, believe me when I say this, I refuse to completely give in to it and I am striving to make something good out of it.

OK, yes I am still walking. As a matter of fact, I have improved on my endurance and speed, which is needed to make minimums of the half marathon in my sites for April. My goal is a three hour half marathon, which is an average pace of 14 minute miles. I will be training with the local running group and doing their recommended training schedule. Although, they will be running and I will be walking, I am thinking their training schedule will be helpful to meet my goal. Nevertheless, it will still be up to me and I am ready to get started in mid January. Brrrr…I am sure that the training will be nothing but cold though, at least it will make it interesting.

I am looking forward to getting 2009 behind me and starting 2010 on a better note. I am definitely hoping and praying that G-d will grant me a better year than my last. I know I am going to give it my best to make it memorable. Plus, I will have a new addition to my growing family coming in April of next year and I am really looking forward to that. If you could, please keep use in your thoughts and prayers. We have discovered that my wife has placenta previa which could cause her to have excessive bleeding and put the baby at risk. So far though, things seem normal.

Anyway, I am deeply sorry that I have neglected my friends and their blogs lately. I can’t say that I will never do that again, but I am going to try to stay away from being a stranger.

Shabbat Shalom and have a wonderful weekend!!!